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Birthdays What to Say

Top 30 Funny Birthday Wishes

Woman blowing out candles on her birthday

Author: Marco Wolfsheimer

Updated: 21st April, 2025

Birthdays are meant to be full of laughter and cheer. When the guest of honor opens his or her birthday card from you, you’ll know why they can’t stop smiling. If you are wondering what to write in a birthday card, why not pick out one of these funny birthday messages or mix and match them with your own words to craft the perfect cheers to another year older.

Funny Birthday Wishes

Here is a list of funny birthday wishes to lighten up the big day and bring a smile to the birthday person's face. Whether for a friend, family member, or colleague, these funny birthday card messages are sure to make their next birthday unforgettable.

You're now at an age when your back goes out more than you do.
I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk, I'd sniff you first.
The only thing getting lit today will be your cake.
You're not getting older, you're just getting closer to looking like your driver's license photo.
I was going to make a joke about your age, but I respect my elders.
Here's to another year of successfully evading my attempts to kill you with my cooking.
You're not old, you're just... oh who am I kidding, you're old.
I would have gotten you a gift, but I figured my presence was enough.
You're one step closer to diapers being a part of your daily routine. Again.
Remember, age is just a number... a really, really high number in your case.
You're now officially too old to die young. Cheers!
Another year older, but definitely not wiser. Happy Birthday!
I hope your day is as pleasant as you are... Oh, wait.
Another year closer to being that crazy cat lady. Keep it up!

Let's have a moment of silence for the death of your youth.
If anyone calls you old, hit them with your cane and throw your teeth at them.
You're not old, you're just... well, let's stick with vintage.
Don't worry, I won't make any age-related jokes. I genuinely feel bad about how old you are.
You're now at the age when 'Happy Hour' is a nap.
Remember, age gets better with wine.
You're not over the hill yet, but you have a great view.
You know you're getting old when your candles cost more than the cake.
Another year, another new place that aches.
Here's to another year of successfully avoiding adulthood!
Here's to another year of questionable decisions and reckless abandon!
Here's to another year of laughing at our own jokes.
Keep aging like fine wine, getting more sour and less sweet each year.
Remember, you're only as old as your internet profile says you are.
Remember, it's not a midlife crisis if you refuse to grow up.
Just remember, growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional.
Not edgy enough? Check out list of rude Birthday wishes.

The key is to keep it light, keep it personal, and always keep it in good taste. Remember, a good laugh is like a gift that keeps on giving, and it's a wonderful addition to any birthday celebration.

Not sure how to kick off the festivities? A group greeting card from Happy Tree Cards is a great place to start. Celebrate their 30th with laughter, love, and a personalized touch that says you're thinking of them on this special day.